The Reader's Digest Version

It's kind of a long story but Nat has been giving everyone a whole lot of grief over Kindergarten.  She's doing great academically but has been really and truly naughty since the 2nd week of school.  I've had a few very embarrasing exhanges with her teacher (who is very nice) and more conversations with Natalie then I care to recount over how we expect her to behave.  Her teacher told us that she sees this every year with a few kids; those who are both very smart, and very strong willed.  Then she mentioned the bad news...that we could expect 4-6w of nonsense before she decided she was ready to comply.  I was pleased to note that her teacher had her pinned.  Nat is the type of kid who has already decided to accept the consequence prior to acting out her bad behavior so when you punish her she has already determined that she doesn't really care.  It's frustrating beyond imagination...but the fact that her teacher had already figured this out about her was helpful.  Also, while I think her teacher's aide does not like Nat I believe that her teacher does.  So, that's good too.

Anyway, now that you have that snippet of background info I'll get to the point.  I have been searching high & low for some new thing that will help guide me thru this time period.  I've signed up for this and that and bought a book or 2 and blah blah blah.  I'm sure most of you parents with "spicy" kids know this drill...  As part of this quest I signed up for an online email called THE DAILY GROOVE.  As with most things I find it to be only partially helpful. 

This one showed up yesterday and I was reading thinking it was hokey and then got to the last paragraph which gave me an intense feeling of peace.  I've made the part I love bold.  Thought I'd share.

:: Implicit Validation ::



Much is said about the importance of *validating*
children's feelings -- telling children that it's okay
to feel how they feel.

What's rarely acknowledged is that children innately
*know* their feelings *are* valid, so they don't need
validation unless they've been previously INvalidated.

When the child's inherent sense of worthiness is
intact, the real beneficiary of explicit validating is
the parent whose feelings were invalidated in
childhood.

Children derive greater benefit from *implicit*
validation, which is most powerfully expressed when we
are willing to be fully present with them as they move
through their emotions.


No words are needed to validate implicitly. You never
say, "It's okay to be happy," you just *know* it's
okay. So why say, "It's okay to be sad/mad/etc," if
so-called "negative" emotions are just as valid as the
"positive" ones?


You'll find it easier to stay present if you hold this
thought: Children who have strong feelings are blessed
with strong Inner Guidance.

Holy Mackerel

I just realized I haven't posted anything since February.  There's a really good reason for this and the reader's digest version is that I am a research administrator for an NCI designated Cancer Center and we're in the middle of our competitive cycle.  I realize that means absolutely nothing to anyone who doesn't share that job description but take my word for it...or don't and just assume I've had my life thrown into a turmoil for the last 8 months. 

Anyway, I saw this today and loved it and need to spend more time focusing on such advice so I decided to post it here.  And am hoping that in November I will have the time, and more importantly, the off hours mental capacity to start blogging again.

New stuff and starting seeds

I have a confession to make.  I have never been any good at starting seeds inside and transplanting them to the garden.  I have an honest to goodness green thumb...really!  I think the issue is that no house I've lived in has ever had the correct amount of sunlight inside to really give seedlings a shot. 

This year I am trying something new.  It's a fairly minimal investment and if it works (especially if it works for multiple years) it will wind up saving a ton of money.  AND it has the added benefit my being able to choose what I want at the price I want as opposed to what the store is interested in offering.

So, I got this thing...

And I got this thing....

And now I just need to wait for the seeds to arrive...

I'll be sure to keep you posted on how this all works out.  :)

Updates on The Garden

I figured out my garden journal.  Yep, Ms. organized has gone and outdone herself again.  Okay, this might not be the best example of organization in my long history of lists and strategy but it's pretty darn good (if I do say so myself). 

I saw this binder at Target.  Doesn't it simply scream GARDEN JOURNAL?

I have filled it with useful things like bad paint.net drawings of the landscaping in my yard.

Notes about what is currently blooming - on a page marked February in the "spring section" of my binder.  For those who are curious this is Lentin Rose & Crocus.

Lovely pages from the High Mowing Seed catalog with circles around the seed selections I made.

 

  

  

And lots of useful advice about things I have had problems with in the past...

and what to do about it this year!

 

 



Garden Journal and First Flower!

I have started my garden journal.  First I drew some pictures of the different flower beds and where trees have been planted...this was all done from memory and is filled with gaps.  As things begin to bloom I will do a spring, summer, fall & winter section to complete my inventory. 

I have also assembled my wish list of things I'd like to plant in the veggie garden this summer.  Considering I have a 12x18' area it's pretty advantageous and needs major paring back.  I'm hoping that shortly after I finish this post I'll be able to choose my seeds and order supplies.

And Happy Happy Happy - we have our first bloom of the season!  Hello little crocus, it's very nice to see you!

Last weekend at the park

We have a really nice park near to our house and go fairly often with the kids and to let the dog blow off steam.  Before, say, 11am we generally have the place to ourselves and so it's easy to let all the kidlets run wild - no leashes needed ;)

At any rate, they put up a new playground recently and it was warm enough, and not too wet last weekend and we gave it a shot.  Got some really fun pictures to share.

Making good on a deal

Back around November James promised that when Natalie learned to ride her bike without training wheels that he would buy her a new one.  She's been sans t-wheels for a month or so now and he finally got around to upgrading.  After much hemming and hawing (she wanted a spider man bike that cost a$120) we have a bright orange Mongoose that says nice things like "eat dirt" in graphics on the paint job.  She is thrilled and after a few adjustments to seat height is off and running!